Can we really choose to be happy?

A fun week last week with a trip to the Isle of Man to coach my client, two free coaching client sessions (winners of a competition), plus a detailed phone conversation with a chairman of an Academy for Chief Executives group regarding my workshop next week. I also enjoyed my coaching client session in Buxton and a good meeting with a CEO of a Nottingham organisation who is looking at a series of workshops for his staff.

Law of Attraction

It never ceases to amaze me how a positive attitude can change the direction of your day.  If you choose to see the positive in every negative situation not only will you find the positive but you will also feel better too. The Law of Attraction states that the feelings you send out come back to you in direct proportion, so keeping positive as much of the day as you can makes sense.

I work on being at least 90% positive during the day often reaching 95% positivity. I do this through re-framing techniques to change negative feelings into positive ones and also stick to something I coach which is: “if you can do something about something – do it. If you can’t then don’t think about it.” This means that if there is anything I can do to improve a situation I will do it for example; make a phone call, write an e-mail, meet the client, produce the proposal, do the tough thing.

Don’t worry be happy

Once I have done everything I can, I then move onto other things where I get busy and take lots of action. I trust that what I am doing will take care of the thing I would otherwise be worrying about. I’ve experienced many occasions years ago when I didn’t know how I was going to pay my mortgage. Worrying about it didn’t help so I would do all I could then let it go and I never missed a single mortgage payment.

Worrying doesn’t change anything about the situation you are worrying about. What it can do however is cause high blood pressure, produce ulcers and bring on many illnesses, so worry and stress really does have a physical effect. Once I have done all I can, I let it go and literally don’t give it one more thought. Because of this I stay healthy and above all sleep like a baby regardless of the pressure I may be under.

Gratitude

Last week I was shopping in a supermarket and saw an elderly lady in a wheelchair and I saw that she wasn’t happy. I can understand this as she is in a wheelchair and has to be helped to get around etc. This sight challenged me because I have said in many blogs there are always many things you can be grateful for and focusing on these it will change your state and will make you feel better.

For a while I thought about this poor lady who may not have much to be grateful for then I opened a newspaper and saw a picture which shocked me to the core. It was a picture of three boys around 8 years of age in India up to their chins in the most disgusting water full of rubbish and they spent all day in this diseased water looking for anything they could sell.

It could always be worse

This was their existence every day probably 365 days a year. It made me realise that there are always people who are much worse off than us and we do have things we can be grateful for if we look for them. My mind raced back to that woman in the wheelchair and I went through a list of all the things she can be grateful for.

She can be grateful for her wheelchair to get her around, for the person who takes her shopping, for the food she eats, the fresh air, the transport to get her to the supermarket, for her TV, for friends and relatives she may have and so on. We can choose to focus on the positive or focus on the negative and which option we take will have a dramatic effect on our happiness and lives.

Actions for this week. 

1. Have a think about all the things you are worried about and make sure you take all the action you can. Once you have done this don’t spend another minute thinking about them just focus on the present.
2. If you start worrying about them just stop yourself and think of something else. The more you do this the easier it gets.
3. Thinking about something positive helps you to forget the negative situation.
4. If this fails, do something you enjoy for a few minutes to take you mind away from the negative situation.

Remember that the only thing that changes when you worry is your health!

Have a great weekend and stay positive!

Warm regards

John