In Every Negative there is a Seed of Positivity

Is time an illusion or is it real? I ask myself this as another month comes to a close and it has simply flown by. I guess you could call it real time vs perceived time. When you are in the dentist’s chair having a filling, a minute feels like an hour. When you are watching a thrilling movie at the Cinema an hour feels like a minute. So it very much depends on what is going on in your life at the time.

If you are busy and fulfilled the time will fly by and that includes the pressure if hitting targets where you don’t seem to have enough time to get everything done. This sort of pressure gives the illusion that time goes very quickly. On the other hand if you are serving in a shop with no customers, time can give the illusion that it goes by very slowly.

Decorating to pay the bills

I love being busy with too much to do and a reason to get up in the morning. It is so good not to have that Monday morning feeling I used to get. I am under a lot of pressure but I much prefer to live this exciting, scary life of a business owner than to have less pressure and less purpose.

This week has been a very exciting one with coaching, keynote speaking and new client meetings. It gives me such a buzz to be building this business as just under 3 years ago I was decorating full time just to pay the bills as I built this business. I was earning £80 a day and it was physically very hard work.

Never give up on your dreams

There were days when I would work 12 hours and this would be full on fast work to get the jobs done. I would be exhausted at the end of each day but I never stopped believing that one day I would stop the decorating and would be running my own business. One of the things I talk about in my keynote talks is working hard on the right stuff and never giving up.

This attribute of not giving up is inherent in all high achievers. When I mention high achievers let me explain that it isn’t just the famous and successful people. It doesn’t matter what you do, if you fulfil the potential you have, and develop in all the areas you can then you are a high achiever. It’s not about the money you earn it’s about living a fulfilled and happy life.

No plan B

I look back on those decorating days and I am very grateful that I had the skills to decorate to earn the money to keep my dream alive. I am also very grateful for the day when I had a serious shoulder injury and I couldn’t decorate for a very long time. This was a very scary time when I suddenly realised that there was no longer a plan B and I had to stick to plan A.

This changed something inside of me and all my focus, 100% of it, went on developing my business and getting leads in. While I was decorating I didn’t have much time to work on my marketing so it was a catch 22. As soon as I was forced to stop decorating I had a massive mindset change which told me that if I didn’t make this work I would be back looking for a job – now that was a motivator!!

Career ending injury

How things have changed in the past 3 years. I have a great team of people around me and I am travelling the country coaching, speaking and training on Mental Resilience. I have recently been signed up by Champions who supply after dinner speakers and motivational speakers. This is very exciting as it shows me that things are developing and I am improving.

Receiving that injury felt like a career ending injury similar to the back injury I received when I was 25 years old and had just signed a professional contract with Sunderland Basketball Club. That was a devastating blow which shortened my basketball career dramatically. However, directly as a result of that injury I went into commercial management, then general management and finally into sales and marketing which has given me a great advantage developing my current business. Without this back injury the odds are strong that I wouldn’t be running this very exciting business making a positive difference to so many people.

Look for the Positive in all situations

So I don’t look at things which go wrong in my life negatively. I always look for the seeds of something positive and I always find it. Sometimes within seconds, sometimes it takes a few days. But by finding the positive in every negative allows me to stay positive for the vast majority of the day which in turn helps me perform better leading to more feelings of positivity.

I’ve just had a great lunch with my best mate Barry Manson (some fabulous ribs!) and he reminded me of something I shared with him years ago from the famous Zig Ziglar “Discipline yourself to do the things you need to do when you need to them and the day will come when you will be able to do the things you want to when you want do them!” Thanks for the reminder Barry!

Thoughts for the week.

Be aware that the things which go wrong in your life aren’t always all bad

1. When something goes wrong see if you can find the seed of something positive in them
2. It’s fun to see how quickly you can find something. This takes practice
3. When one door closes another one opens but there is often a waiting room or a corridor in between which may not be too comfortable (another gem from Barry)
4. Use gratitude to stay positive. If you concentrate on the negative things in your life you will be miserable. If you refocus onto the good things in your life (which are many compared to the poor in this world) you start to feel better in minutes
5. If you want to know what you are thinking just check how you are feeling. If you are feeling good your thinking is good, if you are feeling bad your thinking is bad. So change your thinking to change how you feel. Or as Zig Ziglar said you have ‘Stinking Thinking!’ (the third gem from Barry – I must meet up with this man more regularly!)
6. Finally put the work in now and enjoy the benefits later in life

That’s if for this week have a great weekend and stay positive

Warm regards


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