Stinking Thinking

As I write this blog I’m sat in a nice hotel in Southend on Sea in Essex finalising a workshop I am delivering to hospital staff tomorrow on Assertiveness Skills. The hotel overlooks the sea and sounds idyllic but in reality it is raining and quite miserable outside so no nice sunset tonight. So for a second week running the blog is coming to you on a Friday.

Things don’t always go to plan and we have to accept that this is reality and when things go wrong it helps if we come to terms with them very quickly. The sooner we can accept the situation and move on the quicker we feel good and back to 100% performance. I have reframed this very easily as I have a nice hot cuppa, in a nice warm room, in a lovely new hotel as I write this blog.

Law of Attraction

This links very well to the Law of Attraction which states that ‘the feelings you send out each day come back to you like a photocopying machine.’ So if you are down and miserable all day long you will experience more negative things happening in the days to come. Rhonda Byrne who wrote ‘the secret’, talks about thinking positively and feeling good as the bedrock of seeing success come into your life. Faith and belief comes into this because without faith very little is accomplished.

You have to change the way you are thinking which automatically changes the way you are feeling. If you want to know how your thinking is going just observe how you feel. If you are feeling good then your thinking is positive however if you are feeling bad then your thinking is negative and you need to change the way you are thinking if you want to feel better.

Professional Speakers Association

I attended the Professional Speakers Association Convention last weekend and it was really good to see fellow speakers and catch up with old friends. The event was really good and as usual I took away several good things I can action in the coming months. The importance of being an author was made very clear and we were told that the first place a lot of people go to check you out as a speaker is Amazon to see if you have a book

If you have a book you are recognised as a credible expert in your field and I am so pleased that I have my book finished and printed ready for my book launch next Saturday 24th October at Waterstones Nottingham. This will be a very exciting day with around 90 people coming to see me deliver a 25 min keynote talk then sign my book. There are a couple of place left so if anyone fancies coming along please let me know and I will save you a seat.

The mind is amazing

As you know I am fascinated by the mind and study it deeply. As I was standing in the queue at a coffee shop to order a pot of tea I heard a couple of women next to me discussing how long it was taking for them to be served. One of the two ladies was a strong assertive woman who was making the point of how ridiculous it was and she was clearly very annoyed.

As the middle aged lady brought the latte to the angry lady she told her that this was her first day and she was struggling learn all the new things. The transformation of the attitude of the angry lady was both remarkable and instant. She said ‘I know what you mean, I’ve been there myself.’ They then proceeded to have a nice chat – quite remarkable!

We can change how we fee

This made me think about how we can change the way we think and feel in an instant. In this case it was situational where a new piece of information was given to the angry lady and her attitude changed immediately. I her case she also demonstrated empathy, because she had experienced a similar thing in the past.

We can change the way we think and therefore the way we feel by choosing to look for the positive in things. Whenever something goes wrong in my life I always look for the seed of something positive and always seem to find it. This then makes me feel better and I can move on in a more positive frame of mind.


  1. Be aware that when you are feeling low or down, your thinking is causing this
  2. To change the way you feel change the way you are thinking
  3. To reframe your thinking try to find a seed of positivity in the negative situation
  4. Gratitude can change the way you are feeling very quickly
  5. When you need to feel a bit more positive just think about what is good in your life. You have family, friends, fresh air to breathe, clean water to drink, a car, a home, food to eat etc
  6. This week spend some time observing your feelings and thoughts and see if you can connect the relationship between the two

Until next week have a great weekend and stay positive

Warm regards


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