The Power of Self-Control

I remember a time when I worked for Metro Radio in the North East of England around 35 years ago and I was fired up. Work was coming in and I was working well. I had been focussing on a large client for over six months and was very close to securing the biggest order in the station’s history.

Many hours had been spent on this client and things were looking rosy. I was excited at the prospect of finally landing this client. However, at the last minute the advertising agency I was working with decided to switch the entire budget to TV instead of my radio station.

What a disaster!

The order that I was just about to secure would have hit my annual target and I was devastated. It affected me so badly that for the whole week I moped around the radio station fed up with life and hating my job.

I came in late, went home early and didn’t get much done for that period of time. Then I got another huge order confirmed and I was back on form again, fired up and raring to go. But I had lost four days which I could never get back!

There is another way

A couple of years ago I was working on a major client in Wales and it was looking good for a large contract with my new company JD Mindcoach. I was excited at the prospect of landing this huge contract.

At the last minute, they decided not to go ahead, I was devastated, I was really down, I was fed up and I was angry. But this time I was down for only one hour! I used Mental Resilience techniques to re-frame and made a choice to accept it and move on. I focused on what was good in my life and moved on.

This is a much happier way to live

I had a good day, a good week and a good month. The four days of negativity I experienced 35 years ago didn’t materialise and more importantly it didn’t come back and ‘get me’ later; the negativity simply disappeared with my mindset change.

This was very liberating and made me realise that we have a choice as to how we respond to almost everything we experience. We can choose to go down or get up and dust ourselves off and work out what we have learned from the experience.

Benefits of Self-Control

• It gives you a sense of mastery over your life.
• It allows you to control your moods and reject negative thoughts and feelings.
• It helps to keep overly-emotional responses in check and brings balance into your life.
• It strengthens self-esteem, confidence and willpower.
• It eliminates the feeling of helplessness and reacting inappropriately to challenging situations.
• It helps to manifest mental and emotional detachment, which contribute to peace of mind.
• It keeps in check self-destructive, addictive, obsessive and compulsive behaviour.

“You have power over your mind – not outside events. Realise this, and you will find strength.” Marcus Aurelius

This week has been a productive and busy week with good meetings and coaching sessions. I have been preparing for a Keynote talk I am delivering next week to a large organisation which is very exciting.

Thoughts for the week.

1. How do you respond to negative situations?
2. Are you affected by negativity for longer than an hour?
3. If you are then you need to understand that you can change this.
4. You can look at the positive things in your life and put the negative situation you are facing in perspective.
5. You can choose how you respond to at least 90% of everything you experience on a daily basis.

Well that’s it for this week have a wonderful weekend and stay positive.

Warm regards


Off the Wall – How to Develop World Class Mental Resilience available here (Special offer. Put in code 10POUND when prompted to receive a signed copy for £10 including postage and packing – UK only)

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